Christian Joke – They Speak with other Tongues

“Have you ever been saved?” A rather wide-eyed young fellow startled me with his question as we walked for the bus.  He handled me a booklet with a picture of hell on the front.

“Sure” I responded. “Once when I was 9 years old, I was swimming at Jones Beach on Long Island, and a strong undertow began to drag me out to sea. My Uncle heard my call for help and …..”

“No, No,” he interrupted. “Redeemed! Have you been redeemed? You know reborn ….washed in the blood!”

“What,” I inquired, “in the world are you talking about?”

“Convicted. Have you ever been convicted?”

“No of course not,“ I replied. “I’ve never been in trouble with the law.”

He looked me straight in the eye. “I think you need to be delivered.”

“Delivered? I was just waiting for the bus home. I think I’ll stick with that, but thank you very much.” He looked at me as if I were speaking in another language.

“Can we have lunch together some time?” he asked. “I work just down the street.”

“Sure that would be fine.” He looked harmless enough but I admit he was an unusual fellow and quite difficult to understand.

That Wednesday, I had lunch with Ed. He was a little late but explained that he was have some quiet time.

“Quiet time?” I asked. “What do you mean?”

“Each day before lunch I have a time in my prayer closet”, he responded.

I was puzzled. “Do you pray in a closet at work?”

“No”, he answered. “It’s quiet time in my car.”

“A closet in your car?”

He changed the subject. Like the first day I met him, again he left me confused. This Ed is quite a unique fellow, I thought.

As we parted that day, Ed gave me a little booklet that explained how someone come into a relationship with God through Jesus Christ. I read it and understood a bit more. In fact, I knew that was exactly what I needed. That night I submitted my life to Jesus and I was ‘born again’ as it stated in the booklet. Two days later I told Ed. He was overjoyed.

The following week we go together again, and Ed strongly urged me to find a good body to join. I was surprised at the suggestion but it sounded good to me. I took his advice and proceeded to comb the local health clubs for an attractive woman. When I met Denise, I knew she was the one. We began to date and soon, she became a believer too. Ed rejoiced and told us it was crucial that we get planted so we could grow together.

“Sometimes, it is hard to understand this guy,” I confided in Denise. I told Ed I wasn’t quite sure what he meant by planted so he explained. “Committed! You both need to be committed now that you know Jesus. You need to be involved in taking His body and blood every month in communion too.”

“Now wait a minute”, I protested. “Just because I don’t understand what planted means doesn’t mean I am nuts. Anyway, I think that trusting Jesus is the most same thing that I’ve ever done in my life.” I totally didn’t want to touch the body and blood comment.

It was obvious that Ed’s patience was growing thin. He explained, “Bob and Denise, you have to be plugged in. Don’t you understand?”

No, we didn’t….but I had wondered if getting plugged in had any connection with “going out under the power,” – something I had heard Ed mention but hoped it would never happen to me.

Regretfully, I had to miss worship next Sunday.…but Ed and I had breakfast together Monday morning and he filled me in on what had happened. “God moved.” He said with excitement. “God really moved yesterday.”

“Where is He now?” I pleaded. “I was just getting to know Him and now He is gone?”

“No, No, Bob. God hasn’t gone anywhere.” I was relieved.

“It’s just that so many people were stepping out and moving in the gifts.”

“You mean people were leaving during the meeting?” I asked. ”…and what’s this about presents?”

“No, it’s the gifts. The gifts were really flowing,” he said.

“That’s beautiful,” I answered. “People were giving gifts to each other. I wish I was there.” Now Ed seemed confused.

“Anyway,” he said, changing the subject. “Denise was there and boy was she on fire!”

“Fire? Denise got burned? What happened? Is she OK? Did they call the Fire Department?”

“No Bob, you don’t understand.” That sure is an understatement, I thought. “Denise is just fine. It’s just that I believed she is really called and that God wants to use her. She now wants to get ‘dunked in the ocean’. “ Things were getting clearer.

“Did Denise mention she’s getting too many phone calls or something? …and what’s this about God wanting to take advantage of her? ….and what does she was to get drunk in the river for?” I asked.

Ed sighed. “Can I ever walk in the light with you?”

“Where do you want to go?” I answered feeling compassion for him. “Of course we can walk in the light. It’s daytime Ed.” He just shook he head. I don’t know what it is but sometimes it seems that Ed and I have a hard time communicating.

It’s been two years since I was saved and delivered. Now I’m plugged in and planted, and committed to a body. God has been moving and I’ve been stepping out in the gifts. I can hardly believe how God is using me!

I have developed a new problem though. It seems all my old friends just don’t understand me anymore. When I share about my redemption, that I’ve been washed as white as snow, and that i desire to follow the Lamb, they seem to tune me right out. I guess they’re just convicted that they see I’m on fire.

Author and date unknown. Though I would share this humorous but all so true story I ran across the other day. I’ve cleansed it and prayed the blood over all other influences. So enjoy ….and hear the message of the Holy Spirit through the humour!

Susanne Fengler, Blog Author



PS  You will also see this post on our other blog:  www.christianfoundations.jesus-treeoflife.info


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