9/29 Your Heart and Handling Conflicts

So far, we have been talking about bringing your Heart to the Lord.  One big area in all this is how our Heart handles conflict.  We need to learn to ‘Chose Relationships over Death’.  This means handling conflicts the way the Lord taught us!

….but what does that mean?  How do we choose death instead of nurture our relationships?  What bring death to our relationship with God and with others?  Again, our free will choice is one of life or death in your Relationships.

A. We will all face conflict with others at sometime

You can’t avoid the clash of relationships, so we need to learn how to handle the differences.  When we react and go the wrong way with these disagreements, we bring death – to the relationship, to our heart and to following Jesus.

Ways people handle conflict?  He wants us to learn healthy ways to see these differences and still be human.

We can learn to choose Life over Death every time we follow Him instead of do what ‘Self’ wants to do.  That’s one of the Laws of the Kingdom….‘death to self’.

B. Buttons and reactions

We’ve all been there – someone just pushed a button and your Heart reacted.  It may have been a small thing or a huge thing but your Heart didn’t like their actions.  Example: Daniel and our kitchen arrangement, or at the home groups that we talked about in our last posts.  When my husband took over and rearranged the kitchen, it pushed the buttons that really went back to my Mother!

We can learn to see these ‘button‘ as valuable open windows to our Heart and deal with them!  Our loving Father God loves us too much to leave that pain in our Heart.  Stop and think a minute about your buttons – or have you arrived where you don’t have any?

C. It’s the Judgements that kills!

So what is going on with these buttons?

An event happens….my Heart makes a judgement – right, wrong, good, bad – and takes an offense….unforgiveness sets in….other things come following after!  So what’s the answer?  Where did it all start – Judgement!

Remember, observation and discernment are different than Judgement.  The attitude of ‘should, ought, must’ goes with judgement: “She should have done this….  She shouldn’t have done that….” is judgement.

Train your Heart to refuse to Judge anyone, anything or any place!  You’ll cut right across the enemy’s plans to trap you!

Remember the Lord’s Prayer?  It can read ‘release us our sins as we release other’s sin against us’.

D. Two pattern to resolve Conflicts

We are given two ways to resolve conflicts and they are both in the same chapter in Matthew.

1. Forgive….means?

2. Confront…..means?

Too many of us are doing the forgiving when we need to do the confronting and the other way around.  What’s Jesus saying? That’s the goal!

When we don’t release people, things, places, and take off your judgement of anything – Satan included – we are choosing death.  We are eating of the same Tree Adam chose!

E. Conclusions.

Far more is taught about forgiveness than we have absorbed.  Partly because our Heart hasn’t been heard when it’s been hurt with the event and the offense.  Learning how to hear Heart, but firmly teach your Heart to release all judgement is the path to life!

Yes, that takes practice and learning how to catch your Heart – which means about a quick 5 to 8 seconds race!  It is well worth the race though to catch hold of LIFE!

Susanne Fengler, Blog Author





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